Who is a Widow?
26/04/11 13:33
I’m finding that I share a common bond with women we don’t consider widows. Our groups that invite widows to come for support, encouragement, and instruction are shared with divorced women, women whose husbands are incarcerated, and women whose husbands have simply left them.
This prompted me to study the meaning of ‘widow’ in the Hebrew and Greek. Not being a theologian, I simply went to dictionaries like Strong’s and Unger’s Bible Dictionary. I discovered phrases like, “lacking a husband either figuratively or literally,” “desolate,” “bereaved.” Other phrases were, “of uncertain derivation,” “a woman abandoned.”
Given those definitions, the term ‘widow’ includes more than our western concept of one whose husband has died. To have once had a husband and to now have none unites many.
A friend whose husband is incarcerated found that the widows need to select her new ‘Board of Directors,’ those who will advise her with HER best interests at heart, not their own, was an important concept for her. She needed to discover those who would be her support network for her and her six children, given the reality that her husband is in prison.
Another friend’s husband had moved out, taking the checkbook and more. Her unconditional trust of her husband was admirable. Yet, she was placing herself and her child at great risk by ignoring the legal ramifications of what he was doing and spending, all of which were not in her best interests. Our Bible study on the persistence of a widow seeking justice, and God’s love for those of us alone, empowered her to face the realities in her life. Yes, it was a tearful and tough recognition. Our group was a safe place for those tears and her anger as well.
In my travels in Africa, I had observed a unity of sisterhood between women whose husbands had died and women whose husbands had simply left them. It was not uncommon for a man to announce to his family that he was going to another area, usually a big city or an area that had mining opportunities, to find better work. Often those men never returned. They settled in to a new place and sometimes started another family. That Mom left behind was, by biblical definition, a woman abandoned, desolate, not unlike the woman whose husband had died.
These women shared watching each other’s children while one walked to their maize patch to garden. Given that the patch might be more than a mile from the village, this sisterhood was important for survival. In some cases, the villages were predominately women and children.
This realization for me has raised more questions than answers.
Thankfully churches are beginning to awaken to the biblical mandate of James 1: 27 that is not just about caring for orphans, but widows as well. Does that mandate include all ‘abandoned’ women?
Whether the church acts or not, are there ways that those of us who are widows because of our husbands death, can serve and comfort other abandoned women?
I welcome your insights and comments. Contact us and let us know your thoughts.
Miriam Neff
This prompted me to study the meaning of ‘widow’ in the Hebrew and Greek. Not being a theologian, I simply went to dictionaries like Strong’s and Unger’s Bible Dictionary. I discovered phrases like, “lacking a husband either figuratively or literally,” “desolate,” “bereaved.” Other phrases were, “of uncertain derivation,” “a woman abandoned.”
Given those definitions, the term ‘widow’ includes more than our western concept of one whose husband has died. To have once had a husband and to now have none unites many.
A friend whose husband is incarcerated found that the widows need to select her new ‘Board of Directors,’ those who will advise her with HER best interests at heart, not their own, was an important concept for her. She needed to discover those who would be her support network for her and her six children, given the reality that her husband is in prison.
Another friend’s husband had moved out, taking the checkbook and more. Her unconditional trust of her husband was admirable. Yet, she was placing herself and her child at great risk by ignoring the legal ramifications of what he was doing and spending, all of which were not in her best interests. Our Bible study on the persistence of a widow seeking justice, and God’s love for those of us alone, empowered her to face the realities in her life. Yes, it was a tearful and tough recognition. Our group was a safe place for those tears and her anger as well.
In my travels in Africa, I had observed a unity of sisterhood between women whose husbands had died and women whose husbands had simply left them. It was not uncommon for a man to announce to his family that he was going to another area, usually a big city or an area that had mining opportunities, to find better work. Often those men never returned. They settled in to a new place and sometimes started another family. That Mom left behind was, by biblical definition, a woman abandoned, desolate, not unlike the woman whose husband had died.
These women shared watching each other’s children while one walked to their maize patch to garden. Given that the patch might be more than a mile from the village, this sisterhood was important for survival. In some cases, the villages were predominately women and children.
This realization for me has raised more questions than answers.
Thankfully churches are beginning to awaken to the biblical mandate of James 1: 27 that is not just about caring for orphans, but widows as well. Does that mandate include all ‘abandoned’ women?
Whether the church acts or not, are there ways that those of us who are widows because of our husbands death, can serve and comfort other abandoned women?
I welcome your insights and comments. Contact us and let us know your thoughts.
Miriam Neff